Monday, October 15, 2012

Pregnancy and infant loss day

Today is pregnancy and infant loss day. 

I wrote this  post a few years ago.  I am not the same person as I was then.  I am not feeling the 'raw' pain of losing a baby when I wrote that.  I've had another perfect baby girl since then and have been blessed to have her here on earth for almost 2 years.  I am missing my first baby girl, though.  Always.  I miss her so much that I can literally feel it.  I always wondered what I would feel like years down the road.  And at almost 4 years since I had Emma, I still miss her.  Every single day.  Its not the same pain, but it's there. And I know It wont be going away.  When she died a piece of my heart went with her and I cannot wait to get to heaven to love on my baby girl.  I say all of this because it isnt just one day.  Losing a pregnancy or a baby, changes you.  It changes your life and most importantly, your heart. 

I dont understand the ways of my God, but boy do I trust Him.  It was not my will that Emma isnt here on earth with us.  But if I didnt trust Him, I wouldnt have the promise and hope that I do that surely only comes from Him.   The promise that I will be reunited for eternity with my Emma and the hope that He provides for my life.    

I am praying for all of you who has suffered a loss.  For those of you that are years out and missing your babies and those that are in the raw, physically aching pain.  Know that your babies aren't forgotten. 

I still cling to some of my favorite verses that got me through the darkest of days.   

'Be still and know that I am God' Psalm 46:10

'Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden in light' Matthew 11:26.

"Those who sow in tears will reap with songs of joy" Psalm 126:5 

'Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding' Proverbs 3:5
I posted this on instagram last week.  My caption was 'My heart.  Minus one piece that is in heaven'. I miss that piece in heaven so much and she will never, ever be forgotten.   

***Please visit one of the following blogs for the Silent Auction for the Turner Family starting today as well!:

Wednesday, October 10, 2012

Blog day of silence

Blog/Twitter Day of Silence 10/10/2012

If you havent heard sweet Julee   tragically lost the love of her life on Saturday night.  Matt was killed in a car accident.  They have a 10 month of baby girl, Preslee, who is just sweeter than words. 
Matt's funeral is today.  I cannot fathom what Julee is feeling right now.  My heart is just aching for her and their families.  Please, please pray for Julee.  And anyone else who has lost someone.  If you feel led to help out and donate, please go to Jenna's blog where she has compiled a list of everyone who is helping the Turner's.  I cannot imagine losing my husband, best friend and daddy to my sweet baby girl.  I hate this for her.  I hate that all of their plans, hopes and dreams are gone.  Please, continue to pray for them.  And hold and treasure your loved ones close.  Life can change in an instant and although we have to trust in Him, it certainly isnt always easy.