I was the only one in the office today and the only one in there tomorrow. My boss took my co-workers and their spouses to his home in Florida for 4 days for our Christmas party. I was bummed I couldnt go on the Florida trip, but due to my medical anomolies I was unable to travel. Since I couldnt go, I was going to be "positive" anyways. Well I was "glad" that I would have 2 days to get work done with minimal interuptions & hopefully get caught up on alot of things. Well let me tell you, with things consuming your mind such as this & this I can tell you one thing - being alone all day is NOT a good thing. My mind started to wander and I think I was crying by 10 am. I am missing my sweet girl this Christmas season. I am one emotional wreck (when I am alone...). Then having this miscarriage has made it a little more difficult to suffocate my feelings or suffice them for the work day. I honestly dont know where the day went, and dont know if I got anything done. So I decided to leave at 4:20 to try and beat some of the traffic and boy...It was absolutely horrible. Words cannot even describe. I thought being alone at work was difficult...try being alone in a car hardly MOVING. Thankfully I was able to BLAST the radio and try to tune out the rest of my mind that wouldn't stop going. It helped a little, but only until the multiple commercials came on and all of the sad songs.