november 6th

I don't believe in coincidences.  I just don't.  I believe in a God who is all knowing and all loving.  There is a purpose and reason for everything.  Sometimes we don't understand and we never will until we get to heaven and ask Him ourselves.  But I am glad that I don't understand*.  If we understood our almighty and everlasting God, He wouldn't be just that.  

November 6th is our first baby girls 3rd birthday.  Her 3rd birthday in heaven with Jesus and our 3rd year celebrating without her.  November 6th is a day that our lives were changed forever.  A day that I will never forget.  Emma was born that day at 12:15 and my heart has been changed since that exact moment.  


November 6th is also our second baby girls 11 month birthday.  Like I said, I dont believe in coincidences.  I truly believe that it is a reminder from God what a true blessing and miracle it is to have babies.  As I am preparing for Kallen's first birthday, I cant help but think of Emma's birthday and how they would be a month apart.  It would be crazy around here, I would be trying to plan 2 parties instead of one.  I would have planned 2 other birthdays prior to this so I would have more of an idea but I didn't do that, so I am basically thinking about girly birthday parties A LOT.

I am so incredibly grateful for Kallen, she is just the light of our lives.  There are really no words to express my feelings.  We are so humbled by His grace that He chose us to be her parents.  And the same goes with Emma.  We miss that sweet girl every day and wish she was here.

I hope to have Emma's birthday post up tomorrow, but no promises.  I am also still working on Kallen's 11 month post (weird I know :)      


*Don't misinterpret this, I didn't feel this way for at least the first year or 2 after I had Emma.  I didnt understand why us, why Emma, and to be honest?  I still dont.  BUT I do trust in our Lord and never, ever doubted His love, mercy, and ever forgiving grace that He graciously gives us every day moment.  I am grateful that my baby girl is safe in heaven and that we WILL be reunited one day again.  I cannot wait for that day.